Friday, July 4, 2008

Regression and Guilt

And so it begins...We are visiting my parents, with my husband leaving in two days (and yes, he is counting). When we brought stuff in, the changes they made to their house made us very suspicious. Kind of like they were expecting our visit to be more long, long term than what it is. Sure enough, it was brought up today. About missing the kids, keeping family together, helping each other out, etc. Maybe we could live here with them indefinitely. It would mean so much to them to be with their grandkids. Why do I have the feeling this is going to be a long summer?

And why is it that I, a perfectly normal adult seem to regress when I am around them. Years of conditioning I guess. Hate to make waves, easier to give in, who knows. Today I ended up making pizza for the whole group. Tomorrow they are having company and I am catering it. Enchiladas for 12. I really have no idea how it happened. Although the fact that I hate my mother's cooking may have something to do with it. (She is also on a special diet for her health and so she eats some bizarre things). The deal starts with "if you cook, I'll clean the kitchen". Yeah, right...she wanders off and plays with the grandkids. Trust me I've walked away but the dishes don't budge...for days. It finally drives me crazy enough to just do them. Can't deal with dishes piled up. It's easier to just get them over with. So I've reverted back to the cooking and cleaning person again. I told them after Saturday I'm not cooking any more. I eat very little and there's no reason for me to cook. At least I put them on notice. If I live on salad I get the benefits of no cooking, no cleaning and hey, maybe I'll lose some weight. Maybe eating healthier will help my backbone get stronger. I made a start tonight, let's hope it continues.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Oh man.. my heart goes out to you. Just hold off for a little while - just a little then your damsel in distress adoptive sister is going to seriously need YOUR help and get you out of that tower. No, can't slay the dragon but you'll be out of the tower... Big hugs..